


Bodyguards with Benefits

by fictionfrek101



Category: Disenchantment (Cartoon 2018)
Genre: Bigotry & Prejudice, Character Development, Complicated Relationships, Consequences, Drama, Edit: holy shit it screwed it up big time, Exactly What It Says on the Tin, F/M, Friends With Benefits, Friends to Lovers, Let's see how much season 3 screws this all up, Love was not part of the plan, retelling of canon, that season 3 episode 1 thing doesn't happen here
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-09
Updated: 2021-01-09
Packaged: 2021-03-13 05:48:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,715
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28648584
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fictionfrek101/pseuds/fictionfrek101
Summary: She’s a Princess and he’s the Captain of the Guard. Their trysts are supposed to be nothing more than an occasional fling. But when Bean runs off from her arranged marriage with an elf and a demon, Bean and Pendergast start to realize they have the potential for something more. A retelling of Disenchantment where Bean and Pendergast have an on again off again romance.
Relationships: Bean | Tiabeanie & Elfo & Luci (Disenchantment), Bean | Tiabeanie/Pendergast (Disenchantment)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 19





	Bodyguards with Benefits

**Author's Note:**

  * For [GuestPlease](https://archiveofourown.org/users/GuestPlease/gifts).



* * *

Bodyguards with Benefits

**A Princess, an Elf, and a Demon Walk Into a Bar**

_Chapter One_

The Side Princess

* * *

When Sir Pendergast first came to the castle of Dreamland, Captain Hardwin had given him three simple instructions: restrain the rebellious princess, never piss off King Zøg, and don’t let the kingdom fall into danger.

In three short years he had managed to break all three of those rules with one simple action.

True, Sir Pendergast was considered far and wide to be the hero of the kingdom. He had become the Captain of the Guard at the mere age of twenty-two after Captain Hardwin retired… although considering how expendable the Knights of Dreamland were, it was more so because of Pendergast’s ability _not_ to get himself killed that he earned the high title.

Throughout the kingdom, the men toasted his victories and the women giggled at the sight of him. It was never difficult to find a woman for his arm or bed, but he never took the idea of romance too seriously. Perhaps it was his cynical disenchantment for the magical world around him, the knowledge that any moment he could die and leave a broken-hearted woman behind, or just the simple fact he hadn’t yet met a woman who would set his world on fire.

Well… that last part wasn’t exactly true. There was one woman who would set his world on fire; though more often than not, it was a _literal_ notion.

The woman who was responsible for the need of the creation of the fire brigade. It was the first project Pendergast had ever headed, and caught him the attention of King Zøg. The woman who no matter how much they fought, snarked, and butted heads neither could quite find themselves away from the other’s bed too long.

It was nothing serious – just the occasional tumble when they were bored, sad, drunk, or just outright horny – but if their trysts were discovered by the King, it would be far and away the most serious and life-threatening situation Pendergast would ever face. And he once faced a Chimera… though that might have just been a weird looking goat.

The other Knights of the Zøg table liked to brag about their side pieces, but Pendergast knew to shut the hell up when your friend with benefits was the Princess of Dreamland.

The now _betrothed_ Princess of Dreamland.

Indeed, what had Captain Hardwin warned Pendergast about but to restrain the rebellious princess, never piss off King Zøg, and don’t let the kingdom fall into danger? Instead Pendergast had participated in her debauched lifestyle, done that which Zøg had beheaded too many men to count for, and threatened the alliance between Bentwood and Dreamland should the trysts ever be found out.

…Though in all fairness, Princess Bean had long since been deflowered when Bentwood first started offering for a virgin bride. And that was _not_ because of him.

Probably.

“We have to stop doing this,” Pendergast traced a finger along the skin of her bare back.

It was quite a beautiful scene: the pair of them bare skinned, entwined in an embrace under the dark blue blanket. She laid on her front, her breasts pressing against his well-muscled chest and her white-blonde hair splayed out like a fan over her pale shoulders. They were basked in the glow of the soft moonlight, for just a moment forgetting everything outside the door to Bean’s bedroom. There was no class difference, no political marriage to be, no row of impaled heads lining the castle entrance of men who had dared to look at the princess much less touch her, no drinking until the pain went away, no duty, responsibility, or expectation. There was just this moment of peaceful skin on skin.

Until Pendergast, as always, ruined it.

“You’re getting married in a month,” he said. “If they found me in bed with you-”

“They haven’t yet, and they never will,” Bean rolled her eyes. “Come on, Dude, don’t make this weird. So we hook up every now and then. Who hasn’t had a dalliance? And it’s not like this means anything. We’re not courting. We’re not in love. It’s just sex. A bit of pleasure and a body to warm the other side of the bed.”

“But if they find out about what we’ve been doing it could threaten the entire marriage. They could call it all off.”

“Then maybe we should get found out.”

“ _Princess_ ,” he warned. Even though he glared at her through one eye – the other covered by the ever-present eyepatch he had gained the need of during the great Lemon Crusades – there was no denying the stern look that had earned himself the title of Captain of the Guard.

She heaved a great sigh and rolled onto her back to stare up at the ceiling.

“I was just kidding,” she said in a tone that suggested she very much wasn’t. The blankness that washed over her face was one Pendergast had long ago learned marked the transition from forbidden casual lovers back to Pendergast as a figure of authority and symbol of oppression and Bean to that unfulfilled, sad, and yearning for something more princess. “Besides, if we were caught he’d just force me to marry you, and that’s not much better than the trap of Bentwood.”

Insulted, Pendergast couldn’t help but scowl. Not that Bean noticed as her mind stayed elsewhere, lost far beyond the borders of Dreamland to an unknown world of opportunity.

“You really think this wedding is actually going to go through?” Bean’s question was surprisingly vulnerable.

“Bentwood is secure in its decision, Zøg is firm in his decision-”

“I’m genuinely surprised that hasn’t devolved into a King Fight yet. Did you see how red with anger Dad’s face got when the Bentwood emissaries started asking for too many assurances of my virginity? Zøg was clenching his fist so hard, I was expecting him to start swinging any second and send their heads back to Bentwood in a sack.”

“ _And_ the Council is firm in its decision,” Pendergast continued as if she hadn’t interrupted. “The only way this wedding isn’t going to happen is if the princess bride pulls some sort of shenanigan, and I’ve already got my men running drills for when that happens.”

“I like that you use the term _when_ and not _if_ ,” Bean grinned.

“I’m not an idiot, Princess.”

“So any chance I would be able to hear what those drills entail?”

“A refer you to my previous comment, Princess. I’m not an idiot.”

She looked over at him and smiled, “No… I guess you’re really not.”

He didn’t say anything, just savored the look of a genuine smile on the Princess’ face. It was a rare image, and it would be a lie to say that he wasn’t part of the reason for that. It just amazed him to think that someone who had so much wealth, station, power, and privilege could ever feel so unsatisfied. Yes, she was a woman, but she was turned down for more opportunities than Pendergast would ever even know existed in the first place.

Pendergast had no noble blood in him; all he had was what he had worked for, and worked **_hard_** for. Each day of his life he poured in his literal blood, sweat, tears, and every ounce of his effort and energy to earn his place in society. He wasn’t power hungry: he just wanted a life more than the one he had been born into. He had no silver spoon, but he knew what kind of life he could have if he just fought for it.

It was the mystery that put the distance between Bean and Pendergast. That lack of understanding that both in very different ways were fighting for that some thing: freedom and respect. She just didn’t understand the privilege of her noble blood and he just didn’t understand the privilege of his gender.

Or maybe they did deep down, somewhere their conscious minds couldn’t unearth. That small seed inside recognized a kinship, so when the alcohol flowed and the inhibitions melted away… maybe that’s why time and time again they fell back into each others’ embrace.

And as he watched her smile at him in a way that she offered no other, Pendergast couldn’t help but think that maybe he was more of an idiot than he believed.

Their trysts were wrong, and Pendergast knew it, yet again and again he found himself making the same mistake.

* * *

It had to come to a stop he always told her when the deed had been done, and sure enough it would end. The days passed so swiftly it felt like he just blinked and found the calendar had jumped ahead without his permission or his consent. 

The day had finally arrived: the day Bean would marry Prince Guysbert. Tomorrow she would be off to Bentwood where she would be wife to Guysbert and far away from Pendergast’s temptation.

It was how it should be; he was the Captain of the Guard, charged with protecting Dreamland to his dying breath, and Bean would fulfill her destiny to marry for a political alliance and produce a king’s heirs. The minor affair would be lost to the history books and the rendezvous of Princess Tiabeanie and Sir Pendergast would be nothing more than a fond memory in their old age.

That is… if anybody could actually could find the Princess and get her to said wedding.

Honestly, Pendergast wouldn’t be surprised if the next order he got from Zøg would be to march Bean down the aisle to make sure the wedding happened. Pendergast had never even considered walking down a wedding aisle with Bean, but he doubted dragging her towards a prince against her will would be his first idea of that fantasy.

Also, it would be a good way to lose his other eye. Pendergast may not have believed a woman could be as strong as a man, but he knew Princess Tiabeanie was damn scrappy.

The servants were scurrying around the castle with their preparations, and the guards were scurrying even faster to find the bride. Already the shouts had come that the delegation from Bentwood was less than an hour away and Zøg would be furious if the Bentwoodians found out about Tiabeanie’s escape. 

“Pendergast!” Turbish exclaimed, once again interrupting Pendergast while he was talking to someone of great importance – in this case Prime Minister Odval. He looked out of breath as he ran up with Mertz, though Pendergast had worked with them long enough to know that the panting was not from an overexuberant search. “We cannot find Princess! We have searched everywhere!”

Pendergast gave Odval his far too well-practised look of _forgive me for my idiot right hand men_ , and was relieved when Odval gave a sympathetic nod back.

Odval had been around since shortly after Captain Hardwin had been named the Captain of the Guard by the newly crowned King Zøg. Thus long ago, Odval had learned the quality of warriors Dreamland had at its disposal. There was a reason Hardwin’s successor had been so young, inexperienced, and eyeless when Hardwin’s retirement rolled around. Odval was merely thankful that they had managed to round up at least two competent soldiers in Dreamland in the last few decades.

As for the men Odval had dealt with before coming to Dreamland and the reason for why Hardwin had chosen retirement rather than fighting to his death as per usual for soldiers of Dreamland… well, that’s a story for another day.

“You’re certain you’ve checked everywhere?” Pendergast asked the bumbling duo. In that moment he vaguely realized they technically might count as his best friends, and craved a tankard of ale at said thought. “What of the cheese cave? The crypt of the royal family? The bushes we toss all those scarves Mertz’s mother knits us, when she’s not looking?”

“No, Sir,” Turbish shook his head. “Not a sign.”

“You know, she spends a lot of time on those,” Mertz muttered to himself.

“Then the Princess must have hidden away in the town somewhere,” Pendergast said. He thought hard about Bean’s usual haunts. If she was smart, she wouldn’t go to any of them, but for all her good qualities, Bean wasn’t exactly the sharpest sword in the armory. “Mertz, to the Den of Wonders. Turbish, you check the Plague Pit. I’ll go check Horses R Us to see if she’s trying to secure a ride out of town. If our citizens are smart, they won’t aid her in her escape.”

That was the moment Pendergast realised both Turbish and Mertz had their breastplates on upside down.

“…Right,” Pendergast clenched his teeth, all too aware of Odval’s three eyes on him and that far too pleased smile. “Well, get to it!”

Stumbling a little over their own feet, Turbish and Mertz took off to fulfill their orders. They may not do it with much talent, but at least they did it with a wealth of heart.

Pendergast sighed. He missed Stryker and Bolt.

Odval coolly turned his head toward Pendergast, and in a tone that matched his gaze said, “I do hope all of your men understand the importance of this alliance. Should Dreamland and Bentwood not join together, the results could be disastrous. The Princess’ feelings on the matter is of no importance, no matter what… _ties_ she may have to the people here.”

It took all of Pendergast’s training not to narrow his eye. Odval didn’t need to spell out what he was getting at.

“I assure you that not a soul in Dreamland would dare get in the way. My men will find her, and Princess Tiabeanie _will_ wed the Prince of Bentwood this very day. I give you my word.”

“As a noted man of honour, your word is sufficient for me to place my trust in the guarantee, though unfortunately not enough to calm my nerves.”

Behind the forced smile, Pendergast’s teeth ground together tightly, “Well then, Minister, if you are so concerned with the ability of my men to find the Princess, you are more than welcome to join the search for her.”

“Indeed, I will.”

 _Wonderful_ , Pendergast had to bite back the word as he struggled to keep the smile on his face. He had never been a great fan of Chancellor Odval, though that might be because Captain Hardwin was open to Pendergast how he didn’t trust the man.

Then again the man also didn’t trust Bunty, so maybe it was a good thing Hardwin retired before he fully went daft.

“Should we send word to the King to stall the delegation from Bentwood?” Pendergast suggested. Time was not on their side, and the truth was he was starting to get nervous.

“I don’t believe it necessary,” Odval smiled haughtily at Pendergast. “I doubt I’ll have much trouble finding the Princess.”

“How’s that?”

“It’s quite simple: to find the Princess simply listen for the loudest commotion. I’ll be back in no more than half the hour, just you wait.”

“Then by all means, Minister. You go your way, I’ll go my way, and the men will go where I’ve sent them. We’ll see who finds her first.”

“May the best man win,” Odval inclined his head. “And remember, it would be a disaster if she was not found at all, so no one in the kingdom is to aid her escape. No matter what their feelings or dealings with the Princess have been. Understood?”

“Understood,” he bowed his head in the perfect show of deference to nobility.

And as the minister walked off, Pendergast scowled at his retreating back. Odval knew everything that went on in the kingdom, so it didn’t surprise Pendergast he had learned of the affair. But to accuse him of trying to stop the wedding? Pendergast may have been guilty from time to time of aiding and abetting with some of the Princess’ more base desires, but he would never _ever_ betray king and country to let Bean run off on her wedding day.

…Of course, Pendergast wasn’t about to admit to Odval that he was the one who lowered the drawbridge and gave her a two-hour head start.


End file.
